Thursday, May 12, 2005
ive decided. i will go back,
next year.
but i will miss everyone so dearly. ahaha. i wont forget some people, though.
jaymiie and i are planning to move out after our o levels. when, we dont know. on my personal level im aiming by end of next year.
she ll get out of her mad house. i ll get all the freedom to do whatever i want.
actually i knew, from secondary 1 onwards, i wanna and HAVE TO move out. i cant stand my bad grandma. i wanna go home as and when i like, at whatever time. i want my own personal space.
this time round. i wanna move out not only because of the above mentioned but coz i wanna start life again.. i wanna reset many things... even though i know there are stuff i can never change
and another thing that drives me to start life again is the pain from loving you
when i start practicing my religion.. i do have to let go of any emotional baggage, all old thoughts... or i wont be able to go beyond a low level..
and since ive already had my mind set on going back... im sorry, im really sorry... i havent had a chance to say sorry to you... and prolly never will.. but i am still hoping someday i will be able to.
i still love you. i will always love you, until the day i 'die', and get reborn.
theres no turning back....
once a wiccan always a wiccan.
i wanna kill my conscience, literally;
its killing me, forcing me to go against my will
its the dark, shady road im walking towards, i cant confirm i would be happy that way but i can be sure that im not fighting with my true thoughts and feelings
the exact same way you feel
xoxo
joce-lyn
5:59 PM
